Let's take it easy...
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Mornings...
Some people are amazed when i tell them i always wake up at 5 a.m. even after a long night. I have been that way since i can really remember. And i'm not complaining!
I love mornings! The promise they bring: new hopes... new beginnings.
When i was about 6 or 7 years old, i would wake up very early in the morning and walk in the chilly dawn to our favorite neighborhood bakery to buy our daily ration of pan de sal. This ritual will go on until i was in my fourth year high school: waking up, washing my face with cold water and walking down Libertad street to get my freshly baked bread.
The smell of hot pan de sal in a chilly December was almost magical to me. They would be so tempting that sometimes i ended up eating more than my share even before i got home! Lagot! kulang na ang hatian!
Thoughts like these make me truly grateful for my parents who taught me early on in my life that "we all have to do our share." Growing up in a family of nine, my unspoken role was that of the errand boy: doing the runs for almost anything we needed from the store.
I enjoyed that role! Not just for the perks i may sometimes get from our "suking tindahan," but more for the long walks i would take...and the many magical dreams i dreamt along the way...
I love mornings! The promise they bring: new hopes... new beginnings.
When i was about 6 or 7 years old, i would wake up very early in the morning and walk in the chilly dawn to our favorite neighborhood bakery to buy our daily ration of pan de sal. This ritual will go on until i was in my fourth year high school: waking up, washing my face with cold water and walking down Libertad street to get my freshly baked bread.
The smell of hot pan de sal in a chilly December was almost magical to me. They would be so tempting that sometimes i ended up eating more than my share even before i got home! Lagot! kulang na ang hatian!
Thoughts like these make me truly grateful for my parents who taught me early on in my life that "we all have to do our share." Growing up in a family of nine, my unspoken role was that of the errand boy: doing the runs for almost anything we needed from the store.
I enjoyed that role! Not just for the perks i may sometimes get from our "suking tindahan," but more for the long walks i would take...and the many magical dreams i dreamt along the way...
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
First Thoughts
There have been many previous attempts, but i guess i've finally got down to starting my own blog. Maybe it is about time. After all, knowing myself, it was pretty much but a matter of time.
Ah time... i seem to have much of it in my hands now. Between classes and clients, i'm very fortunate to have some 'me" time left. I really cherish moments like these... peace and quiet...just the hum of motors running in the distance... i've always found the droll of the water pump lulling...almost hypnotic.
This is my first entry... and it's dedicated to Mai Baranda, my partner, lover and best friend. He passed away in 2004, a day shy from my birthday. Ironic? Not really, i find it quite poetic, infact. Although he is gone to that rainbow's end... i'm almost certain the memory of him will creep into these pages every now and then... just like a welcome breeze.
Rosemary Blue was one of our favorite songs. The poignant lyrics lend well to how Mai and i felt about parting and death. Anyone of us would have wanted the other to wear our grief like flowers in our hair...
There For Me was actually a song Mai introduced to me way back in 1983. It came from La Bionda's album that he lent me. Actually, it was in cassette format... how i wish i could have saved it in dvd. But thanks to the internet...i get to play the mp3 from youtube every now and then....
Ah time... i seem to have much of it in my hands now. Between classes and clients, i'm very fortunate to have some 'me" time left. I really cherish moments like these... peace and quiet...just the hum of motors running in the distance... i've always found the droll of the water pump lulling...almost hypnotic.
This is my first entry... and it's dedicated to Mai Baranda, my partner, lover and best friend. He passed away in 2004, a day shy from my birthday. Ironic? Not really, i find it quite poetic, infact. Although he is gone to that rainbow's end... i'm almost certain the memory of him will creep into these pages every now and then... just like a welcome breeze.
Rosemary Blue was one of our favorite songs. The poignant lyrics lend well to how Mai and i felt about parting and death. Anyone of us would have wanted the other to wear our grief like flowers in our hair...
There For Me was actually a song Mai introduced to me way back in 1983. It came from La Bionda's album that he lent me. Actually, it was in cassette format... how i wish i could have saved it in dvd. But thanks to the internet...i get to play the mp3 from youtube every now and then....
In Memoriam
Mai [March 17, 1956 - August 1, 2004]
"Don't bring your flowers to the churchyard/Only the past is waiting there..." - Rosemary Blue
Mai was a gentle person... never raised his voice even everyone else has. Sometimes i wondered if he was ever capable of anger. But as the months grew on, i learned more about him, his simple ways, his graciousness, his sense of adventure, his dedication.
Mai Baranda was my editor at World Executive's Digest. The first thing i really noticed about him as he sauntered into the waiting room was his great fashion sense! He was a bit overweight, i thought, but still his presence was captivating. And that smile! His features were a cross between William Martinez and Lloyd Samartino... of course, many eons ago. Mai was very endearing.
Mai spoke in a soft voice... he was a genteel ilonggo despite that fact that he only set foot in Negros, their homeland, but once. But he spoke with utmost care, as if he was editing his own words in his mind... his brilliant mind.
Mai had a brilliant mind... he was a bastion for information and trivia. How he loved to pass the hours figuring out crossword puzzles and quizzes. And many years later, he would become my mother's ally whenever she was lost for a name, a word or an information. Mai was a dependable source of facts, figures and even historical events. A voracious reader, Mai was capable of reading a whole book in half a day with much comprehension. Well, he wasn't an editor for nothing!
Mai was my best friend...
"Don't bring your flowers to the churchyard/Only the past is waiting there..." - Rosemary Blue
Mai was a gentle person... never raised his voice even everyone else has. Sometimes i wondered if he was ever capable of anger. But as the months grew on, i learned more about him, his simple ways, his graciousness, his sense of adventure, his dedication.
Mai Baranda was my editor at World Executive's Digest. The first thing i really noticed about him as he sauntered into the waiting room was his great fashion sense! He was a bit overweight, i thought, but still his presence was captivating. And that smile! His features were a cross between William Martinez and Lloyd Samartino... of course, many eons ago. Mai was very endearing.
Mai spoke in a soft voice... he was a genteel ilonggo despite that fact that he only set foot in Negros, their homeland, but once. But he spoke with utmost care, as if he was editing his own words in his mind... his brilliant mind.
Mai had a brilliant mind... he was a bastion for information and trivia. How he loved to pass the hours figuring out crossword puzzles and quizzes. And many years later, he would become my mother's ally whenever she was lost for a name, a word or an information. Mai was a dependable source of facts, figures and even historical events. A voracious reader, Mai was capable of reading a whole book in half a day with much comprehension. Well, he wasn't an editor for nothing!
Mai was my best friend...
"If there were no tears to wallow our hearts, then there wouldn't be place for joy..."
I'm sick. It has been three days now and this cough hasn't gone away. My mother has turned doctor with all sorts of medications for me to take... thank God for mothers! At least i get a good night's sleep. The flu has been going around... the cold weather is upon us.
Mai was sick, too. For the many years that i have known him, Mai was perennially pestered by acute gout. It was sad for a guy like him who loved to move around..he loved to dance, take long walks, play volleyball, swim... but as his condition worsened his activities were limited... one by one.
But it came to pass.... the pain...the sadness. I know Mai knows that more than i do!
Rosemary Blue
You tried to wake me in the morning, this was our moment of goodbye... you asked me once how long i'd love you, i told you till the day i die...
And now at last my life is over, you cannot go where i have gone... i won't be there to share tomorrow, i love you so, but life goes on...
Dry your eyes, Rosemary Blue, take a look around there's a world outside that waits for you...
Live your life, Rosemary Blue, put your lonely tears away, wait and see there'll come a day, i'd be with you...
We used to walk the world together, and found our love along the way... but now you must go on without me, we cannot live in yesterday...
Don't bring your flowers to the churchyard, only the past is waiting there... you should be out somewhere forgetting, wearing those flowers in your hair...
music: Neil Sedaka lyrics: Howard Greenfield
"There For Me"
There for me, every time I've been away
Will you be there for me, thinking of me everyday
Are you my destiny, words I never dared to say
Will you be there for me?
Just think of you and me, we could never tow the line
It's such a mystery just to hear you say you're mine
And while you're close to me, so close to me
Just hold me When you're feeling cold and all the city streets are grey
Walking all alone and watching how the children play
Voices in the wind and faces from the past go dancing by
They're asking why
Will you be there for me, every time I go away
Will you be there for me, thinking of me everyday
Are you my destiny, words I never dared to say
Will you be there for me?
And while you're close to me, so close to me
Just hold me
Can you really want me more than for a little while?
What are the stories hiding there behind your smile?
Wishes in a dream and figures in a world that I could share
And everywhere
Will you be there for me
Will there ever come a day when all the world can see
Things were meant to be that way
Will you be there for me?
Can you hear the people say
That you're just
There for me
There for me
There for me
[La Bionda]
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